THE LAST JEDI
BASIC PLOTContinuing on with the saga the First Order try to finally wipe out the Resistance while Rey learns the way of the force from Luke Skywalker.
CAST
Mark Hamill as Luke Skywalker
Daisy Ridley as Rey
Adam Driver as Ren
FACT
The Porgs are a result of Puffins living on the island that could not be moved so they cgi over them for a more fun star wars like creature.
THOUGHTS AN BEST BITS
Utter shit. What the fuck was this i mean come on any one seen that Big Bang Theory joke that Indian Jones never does shit in the movie to help or stop the entire time well this is that joke that meme come to fucking life here i mean what the actual fuck.
Lets start with the story so we sort of continue on from the last movie sort of we really have a fucking Battle Star Galactic rip off story and then we cut to Rey who we should have started with oh and spoilers shes getting fuck all training from Skywalker nothing not a drop iv had more training from watching ROCKY IV(1985) than she gets from old Luke i mean he helps with nothing almost explains nothing gives no help no story no plot point help nothing hes basically a talking fucking wall paper. Then we cut back to the rebel scum doing a MAD MAX(2015) just running the entire movie... but then we have the pointless useless Fin or what ever hes called join up with the hot asian chick now was this a Disney lets add more ethnicity giving us female lead white bad guy good black guy and now asian support girl now sure shes hot an me likes and thank god she can act or that coulda been painful but still they do fuck all mean time they go waste some time and and make some cool explosions but its pure shake my hand to make you look over here and distract you with bullshit its a look over here look at he shinny cause it does nothing plot wise nothing happens its all time wasting then cut back to battle star i mean the rebel ships and they then just drop off like flies they do nothing then at the end its hey turn and blast through you on a kamikaze run well any ways pure shite and the end was what a let down.
Cast wise fuck me i hate him Fin whats his name John Bodaga god he sucks hes so one liner smiley and just sucks here maybe hes great in other roles but hes one of the worst actors ever in the part i mean i could watch a cgi raccoon here easy or even the fucking chucky doll here he sucks bad he sucks so much donkey dick here now sure his character sucks dick but hes bad. Daisy is well hot and easy on the eyes an great fun to watch and does a better job than she did last time and even then she was good so yeh well done. And i even started to warm up to Adam Driver who i was unsure of in the last movie but he was on point. What did suck was the old people acting with Mark and his dad joke looks or humor style and Carrie well shes passed away sure but it was like someone was pulling teeth she so didnt wanna be there sure i liked what they did with her character but i would have killed her character off at the end not well watch it.
Directing wise fuck me this is awful just awful think of a cat taking a dump on your pillow an trying to sleep on it the guy gets the job after they offer him the movie he says nah then they say ok you can direct the next three and write the script an story then he says ok and comes on and fucks the world and story u he ignores the last movie kills off everyone good makes a movie that make less sense thatn PROMETHEUS(2012) i mean fuck what did you do i feel like Buzz at the end of HOME ALONE(1990) Kevin what did you do to my roooooom i mean come on he kills of Luke ? WTF hes the real star fuck her he has to teach her to be a jedi nah ignore that shit no point to the last movie ending with Luke cause hes not doing shit her but bitch about being a jedi i mean bitches more here than when he wanted to go Toshi to buy shit thats allllllll he does then a shit fight at the end and kill him fuck youuuuuuu this was bad so bad shoulda killed off princess cinemin bun an let her go then its left with Luke but nooooo and the enitre disney safe cast is pathetic and boring i mean just when you think finally hes gonna kill of that cunt whats her face comes back an rams him saving his life ? and where the fuck is all the storm troopers at this point ? fuck me its bad its like picture they get to the end of SAVING PRIVATE RYAN(1998) and they get to the town an go "are you Ryan James Ryan" "yes sir thats me" " ok grab him lets head home" the end ? no no just no on so many levels im not joking watch this movie and tell me when it gets good ? like really when the kill off the man bad guy ? so what the fuck was witht he build of of the last movie and this cool new bad guy its like hmm i like a new evil guy and nah hes gone and all thats left is Rey and Darth Emo to now fight it out shes had fuck all training uh man i mean this is lets make a movie that has nothing bad happen to all the cool kids and keep the story going but kill off the folk that are old that the new ones can stay they add nothing and are terrible but keep them around any ways lol. Sooooo bad like story wise just terrible.
Avoid at all costs if you had sense but to see the train wreck have a watch some day but dont expect some cool story or great twist or anything good lets say that.
Best quote: "Help me Obi Wan".
152 mins long. cert pg. 2017
This gets 3 out of 10 on my finger scale.
